Given that media seems to function best when only having to deal with one person who can sum up the hopes and ambitions of black folks, I asked for nominations for black spokesperson. Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton both seem so 1995. Please vote your conscious, and say a short word in support of your vote.White people, have no fear, you may vote too. Furthermore we shall hold a contest for your spokesperson next week. I have to say that the Black Eyed Peas seem to be early favorites in the race to speak for All White People, though we must keep in eye darkhorses like Toby Keith
The Beautiful Struggle: A Father, Two Sons, and an Unlikely Road to Manhood 
White people, have no far
That obviously deliberate typo proves it -- you are really gunning for Yglesias's place in the Atlantic blogging pantheon.
Fixt.
Morgan Freeman, no doubt! No wonder he's so far ahead - Gravitas AND in the photo he's flipping off The Man!
I guess I was wrong. In all his years of blogging Yglesias has never fixed a typo.
Even though she's dead, I think Nell Carter should do it. Or whoever sang the theme song for "Reading Rainbow." I would follow either one of these women to the ends of the earth.
i have a feeling the amazing humor of michael j. jackson's comment will continue to be underappreciated.
hats off to you, sir.
As much as I like Morgan Freeman, it just has to be Billy Dee Williams. He's Lando Calrissian! He's got the authority because he's truly a uniter: white Rebels, golden droids, and even Wookiees!
Also, he's packing heat in the picture. We whites are terrified of any black guy with a weapon. Strike a little fear into us.
Another vote for Billy Dee Williams here!
Although, I am starting to wonder...
Have I just cast my vote for the sleek, sexy Billy Dee of old, or the the fat, greasy Billy Dee that that recently appeared in Command and Conquer 3?
I can't help feeling I may have made a horrible mistake.
If black people get Billy Dee, us whities better get to vote on Harrison Ford. You can put up a pic of him as Han Solo--the one on Wiki has him packing heat too. Reasons he's a good choice: looks good in a leather coat, stars in movies based in foreign countries in which there are no meaningful roles for brown people (not even as villains!), and his relationship with Lando as Han Solo is a decent analogy for how many whites think about white-black relations: despite their friendship, Lando sold him out for a little cash and then regretted it and recognized Han was a better man after all.
"Or whoever sang the theme song for "Reading Rainbow.""
I believe that was Chaka Khan.
A vote for MF Doom here. Get the hipster honkies in the coalition with the rapper who dominates the aesthetics of Adult Swim!
As for White People Spokespeople, I'd like to nominate Lawrence Fishburn. Consider his star-role in Othello: there he played an African hired to lead an Italian Republic, cause that way he wouldn't be beholden to any one faction. Similarly, White people are simply too divided to have a White spokesman. Of course, High-Podesta Fishburn will have to have a lieutenant and an ensign - Eminem and George Clooney would do nicely, I think.
Can white people have Morgan Freeman as our spokesperson too?
Duh, Billy Dee of course. Ladies love him. He could woo the Hillary supporters. On second thought, Billy Dee for VP.
"Reading Rainbow" lady for black spokesperson.
Since I nominated Dennis Haysbert, I voted for him. We'd be in good hands. Billy Dee in those new commercials (Comcast?) looks a bit too comfortable in his old age.
As for a white spokesman, it has to be Dennis Hopper.
Do we Mexican Americans get a spokesman, or are we stuck with Lou Dobbs?
Since George Burn died, Morgan Freeman is God.
He should speak for all of us.
Alternately, how about the Lorax?
He spoke for the trees,
Now he speaks for you and me.
I rise in support of that most OG of nominees: Billy Dee Williams. Sure, the other cats in the competition are cool, but compared to Billy Dee, they cannot compete.
Wolverine. He was married to black woman. And he has a nice voice.
I nominate Sam Jackson for white ppl spokesperson. Even if he was conveying a racist thought, it would sound like The Truth to black ppl.
No matter how this turns out, Charles Barkley will always be my Black Spokesperson.
the clear answer is Pat Riley. Man's got a) style, b) is conniving and scheming, and c) is gifted at sports. the perfect white man to represent all blacks.
Chakka Khan re-recorded The Reading Rainbow theme song but I have been informed that TINA FABRIQUE originated it, and that is who I am referring to.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=c6j8EiWIVZs
Although, this isn't the opening I remember and listening to this I'm not sure this is not Chakka. Hmmm ...
As a white man voting solely on identity politics, I obviously must choose Riles.
Is there any white guy more qualified for the post? I mean, when Dave Chappelle came up with the "I Know Black People" game show, don't you think he probably thought of Riles first but couldn't get him?
I second the Samuel L. Jackson nomination, on condition that he maintain at all times his Jules Winnfield persona. With jheri curls.
I nominated Billy Dee, so I'm staying with him. I might even start watching cable news again if they drag him and his smooth husky voice on screen every time something happens related to Black people.
But isn't it true that Black people never have 1 spokesman? We have two: Good Cop/Bad Cop, Chuck D/Flava Flav, Martin/Malcolm, Jesse/Sharpton. So I say that Billy Dee should have Ernie Hudson as his co-captain. If there's one thing people of all races love besides Star Wars, it's Ghostbusters.
I nominated Billy Dee, so I'm staying with him. I might even start watching cable news again if they drag him and his smooth husky voice on screen every time something happens related to Black people.
But isn't it true that Black people never have 1 spokesman? We have two: Good Cop/Bad Cop, Chuck D/Flava Flav, Martin/Malcolm, Jesse/Sharpton. So I say that Billy Dee should have Ernie Hudson as his co-captain. If there's one thing people of all races love besides Star Wars, it's Ghostbusters.
Although I was originally wooed by John McLaughlin's platform of, "drowning those oreos in milk" and re-instituting the rebel yell (contradictory?), in the end I had to go with Pat Riley. He's got all those championship rings from his Laker days, I couldn't resist.
Does MF Doom really fulfill the criterion of being a single person?
I want Andre Braugher to speak to me......oh, I mean FOR me.....
What about Russell Simmons? Isn't he the quintessential voice of the first wave of the hip hop generation?
It's gotta be Billy Dee! If he's good enough for Colt 45 commercials, he's good enough for all Black people!
Spokesperson, huh...
"I want you to go up to that podium, and find my microphone."
"Which one is it?"
"It's the one that says Bad Motherfucker"
B
I started the Morgan Freeman thang but now I'm beginning to regret it. He really would make a better spokesperson for white people than for black.
Nell Carter is an excellent suggestion, but clearly we need Cicely. If she's not available, the woman from the Pine-Sol commercials will do.
I nominate David Hasselhoff for White Spokesperson. He doesn't take himself too seriously and makes silly music videos. I think that's probably a predictable nomination on the kitsch front though, sorry.
Dennis Haysbert plays a badass military man - Sgt. Major Jonas Blan on ABC's The Unit. And we honour his service. Meanwhile Billy Dee played a traitor to the Rebel Alliance, Morgan Freeman drove Ms. Daisy and MF Doom is needed more by the global force of hip hop than by any one racial group.
So who should our spokesman be? Dennis Haysbert. That's All State's Stand. Like all 50 states kid!